My heart hurts today so this is it:
“When you’re young, your whole life is about the pursuit of fun. Then, you grow up and learn to be cautious. You could break a bone or a heart. You look before you leap and sometimes you don’t leap at all because there’s not always someone there to catch you. And in life, there’s no safety net. When did it stop being fun and start being scary?”-Carrie
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Shoes don't stretch...
…and men. don’t. change. Maybe I’m being a hypocrite, but right now I’m too pissed off to think so. I’ve done my share of repeat-offenses (and have the record to prove it—eek).
I’m at my wits end. I understand in relationships you have to compromise. But when it comes down to it, the person you started dating is the person you’ll always be dating.
I guess the defining factor is how much you’re willing to put up with, and how much the character flaws bother you.
And now it’s for me to decide.
I’m at my wits end. I understand in relationships you have to compromise. But when it comes down to it, the person you started dating is the person you’ll always be dating.
I guess the defining factor is how much you’re willing to put up with, and how much the character flaws bother you.
And now it’s for me to decide.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Covering the basics...I need, I want, I buy.
(Brought to you by the unveiling of the Macbook Air...thanks again, Steve Jobs.)
Necessities can be a very subjective topic. Something seemingly crucial to me may be categorized as a frivolous purchase to my neighbor. I’ve been thinking about needs versus wants a lot lately as I prepare to start budgeting for law school and other lifestyle changes as J graduates from college and we move in together.
Usually my stream of consciousness goes something like this, “I NEED new jeans, I WANT William Rasts. William Rasts are $220 on the website and at Nordstrom. But if I buy them on eBay I can save $100, and I still get my high-quality designer denim and don’t have to settle for $80 Abercrombie jeans that will last half as long.” I try not to sacrifice my brand loyalty whenever possible. This is because I prefer to pay more up front for a product I know and trust, particularly when a warranty or buyer protection is involved. For this reason, I love my AmEx card, Costco, Apple, and eBay, for offering buyer-satisfaction guarantees, and ensuring I will be happy or reimbursed for my purchase. I can also trust the quality products to perform well and pass the test of time. I have been cutting back on purchases that don’t really affect my daily life. I love Starbucks, but not enough to spend $5/day on it. I would rather spend $6 on a huge container of coffee at Sam’s Club, and allocate the savings to another area of my life. So while I may invest in a sweet computer, HDtv, vacation or lip gloss, my retirement and savings accounts aren’t suffering, and I’m not just racking it up on a credit card making minimum payments as I go.
I believe it’s important to sacrifice in certain areas to be able to enjoy the things that truly bring you happiness or comfort. This is all swell if you have the luxury of discretionary money period. As I grow I’m beginning to realize many people have NO “fun money” to speak of. Or, more likely, is they do, they just spend it in ineffective ways. Medical bills, student loans, credit cards or other high-interest loans prevent a lot of people from ever keeping up with their debts or learning how to live within their means. Financial hardships prevent people from getting ahead, usually because they never learn to stop making the mistakes that got them into the situation in the first place.
So many stressful money situations can be avoided if we all start thinking before we spend. For me, the hardest part is removing myself from opportunities to spend money. Ideally, I should never make a purchase that isn’t premeditated, whether it’s a pack of gum or new bedsheets. I’m going to try to facilitate this mindset by getting back to the basics. There are relatively few things I actually NEED.
Physical needs: Food, clothing, shelter, medical care, exercise, sex.
Emotional needs: Social interaction, connection to family, romance (yes, I need it!)
Developmental needs: Intellectual stimulation (soon to be in the form of CLASS again), personal growth, new experiences, giving to others/volunteering.
Outside of those things, I justify purchases based on their accordance with other values. Health and beauty are important to me (obvi, for most girls), as are comfort and organization. So when I find a product that I can’t live without in these categories, I’m usually hooked bc I know it will fulfill a need and maybe simplify my life a little.
Thinking about this could inspire a “Top 20 purchases” post. How about you, what can’t you live without?
Necessities can be a very subjective topic. Something seemingly crucial to me may be categorized as a frivolous purchase to my neighbor. I’ve been thinking about needs versus wants a lot lately as I prepare to start budgeting for law school and other lifestyle changes as J graduates from college and we move in together.
Usually my stream of consciousness goes something like this, “I NEED new jeans, I WANT William Rasts. William Rasts are $220 on the website and at Nordstrom. But if I buy them on eBay I can save $100, and I still get my high-quality designer denim and don’t have to settle for $80 Abercrombie jeans that will last half as long.” I try not to sacrifice my brand loyalty whenever possible. This is because I prefer to pay more up front for a product I know and trust, particularly when a warranty or buyer protection is involved. For this reason, I love my AmEx card, Costco, Apple, and eBay, for offering buyer-satisfaction guarantees, and ensuring I will be happy or reimbursed for my purchase. I can also trust the quality products to perform well and pass the test of time. I have been cutting back on purchases that don’t really affect my daily life. I love Starbucks, but not enough to spend $5/day on it. I would rather spend $6 on a huge container of coffee at Sam’s Club, and allocate the savings to another area of my life. So while I may invest in a sweet computer, HDtv, vacation or lip gloss, my retirement and savings accounts aren’t suffering, and I’m not just racking it up on a credit card making minimum payments as I go.
I believe it’s important to sacrifice in certain areas to be able to enjoy the things that truly bring you happiness or comfort. This is all swell if you have the luxury of discretionary money period. As I grow I’m beginning to realize many people have NO “fun money” to speak of. Or, more likely, is they do, they just spend it in ineffective ways. Medical bills, student loans, credit cards or other high-interest loans prevent a lot of people from ever keeping up with their debts or learning how to live within their means. Financial hardships prevent people from getting ahead, usually because they never learn to stop making the mistakes that got them into the situation in the first place.
So many stressful money situations can be avoided if we all start thinking before we spend. For me, the hardest part is removing myself from opportunities to spend money. Ideally, I should never make a purchase that isn’t premeditated, whether it’s a pack of gum or new bedsheets. I’m going to try to facilitate this mindset by getting back to the basics. There are relatively few things I actually NEED.
Physical needs: Food, clothing, shelter, medical care, exercise, sex.
Emotional needs: Social interaction, connection to family, romance (yes, I need it!)
Developmental needs: Intellectual stimulation (soon to be in the form of CLASS again), personal growth, new experiences, giving to others/volunteering.
Outside of those things, I justify purchases based on their accordance with other values. Health and beauty are important to me (obvi, for most girls), as are comfort and organization. So when I find a product that I can’t live without in these categories, I’m usually hooked bc I know it will fulfill a need and maybe simplify my life a little.
Thinking about this could inspire a “Top 20 purchases” post. How about you, what can’t you live without?
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Go Time.
In an attempt to increase the cohesion and frequency of my blog postings, I decided I had better first spend some time reading other blogs. I have found SO many types of blogs I love…travel blogs, 20-something blogs, diet blogs, finance blogs, enough blogs to occupy the majority of my work day if I let them!
As a major motivator, I will be starting law school in the evenings, beginning in July. This means homegirl has REALLY got to crack down on the writing skills. I think reading and writing in the blog world should help me to get back in the habit of writing, spur (hopefully) a little creativity, and also help me to vent some daily frustrations. I look forward to the possibility of using my blog as a tracking device for happenings in my life as well.
A full-time work day at the law office and evening classes 5 days a week also means that Really-Not-A-Waitress really WON’T be a waitress anymore, which is perhaps the biggest motivator of all. As much as I tell myself I despise waitressing, I still have mixed emotions about losing my source of instant cash flow. It’s nice to have the reassurance of being able to go in anytime and pick up a shift if I need extra money, or a pair of new shoes. Obviously getting a JD is a much better way to spend my spare time. Lest I forget, here are some other reasons I won’t miss the service industry:
-The b*tch who had the audacity to tip me $5 on $78 and write “very nice” on the receipt after she watched me bust my ass with 9 (literally, 9) other tables and make her 22-yr-old son a freaking peanut butter milkshake TO GO.
-Working 8-6 at the firm, then 7-2am at the bar…long day doesn’t quite cover it.
-not having a spare hour to work out or grab a beer w/ friends
-getting snapped or whistled at
-never knowing if my manager is going to ignore my requests and schedule me w/ conflicts
-being treated like a waitress, period.
As a major motivator, I will be starting law school in the evenings, beginning in July. This means homegirl has REALLY got to crack down on the writing skills. I think reading and writing in the blog world should help me to get back in the habit of writing, spur (hopefully) a little creativity, and also help me to vent some daily frustrations. I look forward to the possibility of using my blog as a tracking device for happenings in my life as well.
A full-time work day at the law office and evening classes 5 days a week also means that Really-Not-A-Waitress really WON’T be a waitress anymore, which is perhaps the biggest motivator of all. As much as I tell myself I despise waitressing, I still have mixed emotions about losing my source of instant cash flow. It’s nice to have the reassurance of being able to go in anytime and pick up a shift if I need extra money, or a pair of new shoes. Obviously getting a JD is a much better way to spend my spare time. Lest I forget, here are some other reasons I won’t miss the service industry:
-The b*tch who had the audacity to tip me $5 on $78 and write “very nice” on the receipt after she watched me bust my ass with 9 (literally, 9) other tables and make her 22-yr-old son a freaking peanut butter milkshake TO GO.
-Working 8-6 at the firm, then 7-2am at the bar…long day doesn’t quite cover it.
-not having a spare hour to work out or grab a beer w/ friends
-getting snapped or whistled at
-never knowing if my manager is going to ignore my requests and schedule me w/ conflicts
-being treated like a waitress, period.
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